Another architectural masterpiece

For Christmas, Kenzie asked Santa to bring her a "pretty castle".


Well by the time Santa got his marching orders - there wasn't a pre-made "pretty castle" to be had. So Santa had to start looking at alternatives.


Luckily Santa found a nice elf online who makes these beautiful wooden blocks so children can make their own pretty castles. The really neat thing is that these blocks are so versatile... and Kenzie can create to her heart's content. Too bad we don't have a doubled set.


So - I have here her latest masterpiece.

I can understand how Kenzie is - she's not really tomboy-ish at all. She's very girly and feminine in her own way - but what interests her isn't the strictly girly things - she simply has her own interests - and we are not going to do anything to squelch her desire and drive to be creative in her own way. I was always more interested in what was at one time considered "boys' toys" - microscopes, minerology sets, pup tents, cameras, etc.... they were far more fun to play with than any number and kind of dolls. I never understood how anyone could get a big kick out of arranging furniture in a doll house - but that was just me. I preferred every time we took a trip to look for new rocks to add to my rock collection. Kenzie has been talking about going somewhere to look for rocks to create a collection as well.... and she wants to give me "pretty rocks".

I think she's a lot like me - and it's not just because she lives with us... this is just who she is. With adoption, you always wonder how much is nature and how much is nurture. But there are times when you know 100% that it is just who the child is and not from any undue influence of the parents on the child - other than allowing the child to pursue her/his own interests.

And to be sure - gotta love that cocky little smile. So sure of herself. I hope she stays that way even in her teenage years.

Have a rockin' good Christmas!

What to do with blurry Christmas pictures?



Make a video! Enjoy - and may you have a joy-filled Christmas and Happy New Year!

Mama's little architect

Kenzie loves to build. The best toy she could have would be blocks. Any kind - any shapes... if she has them, she puts them together.



I have seen her take toys that can be interlocked together or just plain cardboard blocks and build some of the most interesting structures. I never had that in me... I didn't ever have the patience or imagination for that. But this kid... her understanding of spatial relationships and her grasp of what makes something work and other things not work... couple that with her ability to concentrate for long periods of time if necessary - and she sometimes amazes me. I am going to start taking pictures of her creations so I can show her styles. She never makes the same thing twice, even if she has the same number and size of blocks... she always creates new stuff.



Below is one of her recent creations she made while at daycare. She calls it a restaurant.

Is this the beginning of my downfall?

The other night, Kenzie and I had visited my mother at rehab. When we left, I got Kenzie in the car and just began buckling her in - it was COLD outside and I wanted to get inside the car and go home.

Kenzie began yelling and pumping her fist up and down, saying, "You ruined everything! I wanted to do it!"

OK, now I know what I'm going to be in for when she's a teenager. She'll get mad at me about something and then start yelling, "You ruined my life!" (We all know how teenagers tend to exaggerate a bit, right?)

I guess from now on I have to ask permission to buckle her up...

or not.

With a Rebel yell, she cried More! More! More!

OK, maybe I got your attention... but this was on purpose.

I have always been the kind of person who loved photography but always went for the easy point and shoot cameras. Until now....

I bought a Canon Digital Rebel XTi... and I am in LOVE! I'm learning what to do with it still, but even novices who aren't all that experienced with cameras can get started on this camera fairly easy (DO read the directions first!) and even if you aren't a pro - some of the features will have you feeling like one in no time. I love the AI Servo feature, where the focus focuses on the subject all the time, so you can capture action. No more posing - just let her go do what she wants to and take pics. If my dad were alive he'd be in heaven with this camera.

My only problem now will be choosing which ones I make pictures out of and which ones to ignore. When you have a kid as cute as mine and a camera that does what this one does - that make the job even harder!

My little supermodel

The dress and leggings were a gift from my husband's cousin. Made for an adorable get-up. Kenzie loves the dress. Just had fun this morning snapping pics, and letting Kenzie be herself. Kenzie has watched some older episodes of America's Next Top Model and she thinks the show is really cool... although she also thinks some of the models are big babies. She's right.

She'll never be tall enough to make a top model - but she's awfully cute!

The brothers are at it again....

If one is unfamiliar with what is going on in our family, please refer to this post and this post. It will catch you up with today's latest update.

My brother Richard has been calling mom on a regular basis (as regular as you can get for Richard). He's playing the "good son" by calling... not that he is really listening to anything she has to say... until the last phone call.

Mom has been having panic attacks, and the doctor has prescribed medication for them... and we've been trying to get her to use an anti-depressant. She's been in constant pain from her shoulders hurting - she has no cartilege where the bone enters the shoulder socket - so it is just bone against bone and it is playing hell with the nerves in her arms. We should be able to take her to a surgeon and possibly schedule the surgery that she was originally supposed to have back in April, when they found out she had a heart problem. If she can get some relief from this, it will be a blessing!

When Richard heard that she was having panic attacks (mom actually got a word in edge-wise) he said she should have someone come live with her and take care of her. Now, that wouldn't be a bad idea - however, Richard suggested that she let Bill and his wife Erica move in with her.

Sorry - this is where gales of laughter come streaming out of EVERYONE'S mouths.

Now someone tell me that Richard is reaaaaaallllly mad at Bill and is reaaaaaallllly sorry that he hurt mom's feelings! It sounds to me that they are still neck deep in their little conspiracy. Richard isn't mad at Bill - they are just trying a new tact to get at mom.

Bill.... the one who wanted to charge her for every little thing he and his wife was doing to "help" her when she got out of rehab. The one who lied to her about me, and then with Richard's help schemed to cut me out of the will and wanted to have her make him Power of Attorney. Bill - whose house is being foreclosed upon, and has filed bankruptcy 3 times in his 42 years of existence.

And this coming from Richard - who called the Department of Children's Services on me with unsupported allegations against us. Richard, who thinks he's smarter than the average Hostess Ding-Dong... well, maybe just slightly smarter than the Ding-Dong.

My mother was great - she said NO WAY! She was NOT going to let them come and stay in her home... I am glad she has her wits about her and knows that Bill will only take advantage of her. And he hasn't called mom or made any effort to contact her after he had spoken to her the last time. That spoke volumes to her that the only thing he cared about was her money - not her as his mother.

I know this is so hard for mom... and I wish we lived closer together (I'm grateful it's only 25 miles away and not 250!) I am only asking for prayers that she be able to have the surgery and that it will help the pain she is going through every day right now. And perhaps that will help her to get relief from the panic attacks.

Navy Pier and Pics from both days

Today was Navy Pier day. Of the two places (Lincoln Park Zoo and Navy Pier) I like Navy Pier best. But it was scorching hot today... and there really wasn't much of a breeze off of Lake Michigan.


It's a good thing Kenzie is only 4 and doesn't need expensive entertainment to have a good time right now. Just being with her family is enough... and anything else is just that much extra fun.


Last year, Kenzie had a SpongeBob Ice Cream Bar and was wild about it. (I had tried a taste and thought it was gawd-awful!) But this year, she insisted that she have another one. Yuck!

Of course, there were other things to do at the zoo... but she mostly spent it either walking on the metal fencing or taking her own pics. Plus, I drove her nuts trying to take her picture... poor kid - she's going to end up with a phobia about cameras because of me.

At Navy Pier, they have a marvelous Children's Museum. Mondays, children get in free. Kenzie likes the area where you can pretend to make food items and sell it. Last year she especially liked the cash register... but this year, all she wanted to do was "make pizza".

The one thing I liked most about Navy Pier is the view. It's a really nice view of the city and Lake Michigan. I think next year we'd like to take one of the boat tours to see downtown Chicago's architecture. Kenzie was really wanting to go on a boat. When one of the tour boats blasted its horn before departure, she just had to watch it leave the dock close up.

I think the last picture says it all. Family is what is important. We come up to this area to visit Roy's mom, and Kenzie loves her Grandma Geri so much! We absolutely love coming to see her and spend time with her... and I think kids seem to know innately what we as grownups tend to forget: spending time with family is all that really matters when it comes to having a good time. Hopefully, the pictures and video I've taken with her and her Grandma Geri will help preserve that love and the memories we are building with Kenzie.

Hello from Chicago!

Yup... came to Chicago this weekend. Last night, we ate at a place in Des Plaines called The Omega. LOVE it - their prices are reasonable and the food is great - and you get so much one of these meals could feed my mother, Kenzie and me. Kenzie loves their matzo ball soup. A Chinese girl eating Jewish food. Who'd a thunk it!

We met Roy's brother's girlfriend, Jane, and Roy's cousin, Elaine. Elaine gave Kenzie an Etch-a-Sketch and a child's learning laptop (not an expensive item - just a toy) and a really beautiful dress. (When we got back to the hotel from the restaurant, all Kenzie wanted to do was play with the computer toy!)


And Kenzie really took to Jane. She must be really good with kids... Kenzie wanted Jane to come back to the hotel with us, and was really upset when she found out we wouldn't be seeing her until probably next year. She began to cry. Yeah, I think I can safely say Kenzie really thought the world of her.


I have pictures and a little video to post. Here are some pics that Kenzie took with her little camera over today and yesterday.

Dance lessons

Last Tuesday night was Kenzie's first dance lesson. Although I have five videos on YouTube for the entire night (each around 3 minutes or so) I thought I'd post my two favorites here. She was so excited to be learning how to dance... and she also got to participate in some gymnastics, which she absolutely LOVED. So, I am including my favorites from the Gymnastics session.

Questions about heaven from a 4 year old

Kenzie insisted that I read a book to her last night. It was about the first Easter... and told of Jesus and how he died on the cross. She couldn't understand why God would want Jesus to die, why they put nails in his hands and feet, why the broke the bones of the other criminals who were crucified, why they wrapped Jesus up in cloth and put him in a cave, how the angel moved the big stone from the cave, how did Jesus get to heaven, and on and on and on.

She also wanted to know why there was so much fighting in Israel. Another one that I don't have enough information to answer....

Heck, half the time, I don't understand all of this, either. But I was trying to answer her questions as best I could. Man - Kids ask the hardest questions! I never thought I'd have to know so much to be a mommy...

She was pondering how the soul leaves the body. I told her I didn't know how it happened, that perhaps, it was somehow connected to our bodies while we are alive, but when the body dies, it is freed to just leave the body and fly away.

She then wondered how the soul would fly up to heaven. I told her I didn't know... since I had never done it.

Her reply, "Perhaps it has to get on an airplane and fly to Israel..."

As good a reply as any others out there.

I love her innocence. I love her being so inquisitive. I love the fact that she insists on answers that make sense to her. And I love it that her mind is working to figure out the how and why of everything around her. She is not as accepting of information as I was... she wants an acceptable, plausible answer. And it appears to me she knows when an answer is plausible and when it is not.

Which makes my job harder. But watching her mind at work is marvelous and fascinating!

Let me rethink that....

Last night, as I was giving Kenzie her bath, relayed to me what her daycare teacher told her. Here was our conversation....

K: You know what Miss Vanda said mommy? Miss Vanda said that if we kids ate our cereal bars all up then we would get big like her. (Note: Miss Vanda isn't a small woman, and I don't mean she is tall....)

M: Do you want to be big like Vanda?

K: (furrows her brows as she gives it a little thought - then her eyes open wide as she realizes what the answer would be.) NO! I don't want to be big like her! (then she starts laughing.)

*********

And then the other night, when her daddy was telling her a bedtime story - she all of a sudden says, "Wait a minute!"

She sat on her daddy's chest, leaned her butt to his face, and FARTED!

OH, she thought this was hilariously funny. So did daddy. Unfortunately, so did I. I guess there goes our ability to teach her any kind of etiquette or respect for her parents.

She doesn't do it to me.... yet.

If I had done that to my dad, it would have been the kiss of death.

Adoption Agency Reunion Picnic - July 28

Our adoption agency has a picnic event once a year in July, and I have taken Kenzie three times in the last four picnics they've had. The first picnic I might have attended with her, in 2004, was just too soon after returning from China, and I was still suffering from jet lag still.

This year was the best one ever. We got to see one of our facilitators from China - Genie! We absolutely love her still... and she is one of the most outstanding people we've met in our lives. We truly hope that if we get to go back to China, we can hire her to take us around to places we want to see and go... she would be an awesome guide. And for us, it would be a dream come true.

We also got to see three of our friends who adopted in our travel group. All the kids were from Hunan - the three little girls were from Yongzhou, and our daughter is from Changsha #2.

I have pics below from the picnic. Not many, because my Nikon 8700 BROKE after taking the pics of the four kids together. AAAAAAGHH! I purchased a 5 year warranty with it... and hopefully that will cover what went wrong. (I have tears in my eyes... I wanted to take more pics!)

I also have two short videos - one with Kenzie and Genie! Hugs and Kisses to you Genie!

The latest dope on the brothers

Well, it just gets better and better.

My youngest brother has now filed bankruptcy -for the third time in his life. I find that apropos, since he has never taken any responsibility for any of his failings in life. It's always someone else's fault as far as he is concerned.

My brother Richard showed up at mom's house at around 11 pm last Sunday night. She was trying to go to bed. (Richard is always on Richard-time - there is no other time zone in his eyes, and everyone is supposed to accomodate him.)

He told mom that he wanted to apologize for how he talked to her the last time (calling her a whore, slut, bitch, etc.) He said he did it to make Bill feel good because he felt sorry for Bill. He also said that he had listened to Bill talk shit about me and he fell for it. And he said that alot of what Bill is doing is because of Erika, his wife.

WTF?????????????

Yeah, and we also believe in the tooth fairy, right?

That is the lamest, worst and most F---ed up excuse I have ever heard in my life.

A MAN doesn't try to placate or play to the sympathies of scum in the family just to make them feel better at the expense of his mother, who never did anything to hurt him. A real man would have re-arranged things so he could have visited or helped out. A real man would not give her reason to stress so she could recover more quickly from her surgery. A real man wouldn't try to manipulate her and the entire situation to the detriment of other family members. But Richard isn't a real man. And now everyone knows it. Hell, I've got more balls than he ever had - and perhaps that's why he's jealous of everything I have and am.

I can tell you that it was Richard who trash-talked about me to Bill, back in 2005, and Richard is the one who got Bill so mad at me that he now hates me beyond redemption. Richard is the one who instigated this division in the family.

To top matters off, Richard shows his true colors and blames Bill's wife (who is African-American, by the way - and Richard hates anyone of any color, nationality, ethnicity, or religion that either isn't white or a yes-person to Richard's idealogy) for leading Bill into trying to get mom to make him Power of Attorney and cut me out of the will.

Richard forgets he shot off his mouth to mom's neighbor. He told her that Erika liked him and that they were "friends" because he bought her a designer handbag. That was a very uncomplimentary thing to say. He basically told the neighbor that Erika was so weak and easily manipulated that her loyalties could be bought with a simple gift. (Notice Richard did not say he liked Erika....)

Furthermore, Richard is trying to make himself out to be an innocent bystander. Again, he forgets that he talked to the neighbor. He forgets that after mom told Bill what the neighbor said, he called the neighbor and told her that she should just stay out of their business when it came to mom, that they (meaning Richard and Bill) knew what was best for mom, and that Bill would be the best choice for Power of Attorney. That doesn't sound like someone who is innocent in all this - it appears to me that someone who is that involved to tell a friend of mother's to "back-off" is up to his eyeballs in taking charge of the deception and conspiracy (and crap) that is surrounding my mom.

Innocent my ass..... and my ass has seen enough shit in its 51 years that there is no innocence left in my world. Sorry - that was probably a bit more graphic than I intended it to be.

Here's my take on all of this.

I say that since Richard couldn't manipulate mom through Bill (and Richard has played Bill like a fiddle - oh I just couldn't resist that, since Richard is a violin broker) he decided to just go straight to the source of his disdain and try to manipulate mom himself. Now I am worried that she will end up in trouble - not because she will capitulate to Richard, but because she won't. And Richard has a horrible temper - and I fear he may lose his "self control" (what thinly veiled amount there is) and hurt her. But I have nothing to pin this feeling on... just my gut feelings.

Richard thinks mom is a fool and can be made to do his bidding. I personally think he's wrong.

Bastards for brothers

It pains me to say this, but I have two bastards for brothers. Bastards in the sense that they are willing to make false claims about our home and our treatment of our daughter to the Department of Child Services, just to hurt us. What they did was hurt and anger our mother and most importantly, they hurt my daughter.

My youngest brother had earlier in the month of June made the claim to my mother that he had seen me wiping out her car with a towel because I had left the top open during a thunderstorm and now it had extensive water damage. (My mother at this time was still at the rehab place and still not capable of thinking in any logical sort of way.) I tried to tell mom that it wasn't true, and she could see for herself, but she would have none of it. She wanted her car back in her garage. (I had been driving it because she needed to go to doctor's appointments or wanted to go out to eat, and it would have been impossible to take her, my daughter, and me in a two-seater truck.)

I took the car back and left mom alone, not going in to see her at her rehab place. My brother Bill took over. He brought her home when she was ready... and then he and his wife Erika stayed with mom several nights. They finally began to pressure her to make him Power of Attorney (I am currently Power of Attorney) and to cut me out of the will. (I will say that no matter how bad it has been between my brothers and me, I have never asked mom at any time to cut them out of the will or trust... that in the end, they would find that I would take my duties as Executrix and survivor Trustee seriously, and everything was going to be distributed as mom had wished.)

I think at that point, my mother knew she'd made a horrible mistake by believing Bill had her best interests at heart. She had called her neighbor and asked her what to do or think. Her neighbor counseled her not to give Power of Attorney to Bill, but if it was such a problem, then she should speak to her lawyer. Mom's neighbor also asked that she not tell Bill what she had said.

But mom didn't remember that request, and Bill found out. It wasn't too much longer before the older brother, Richard, called mom's neighbor and told her to mind her own business, that "we know what's best for mom" and Bill would be the better choice as Power of Attorney. Which is absolutely laughable.

You see, Bill can't even handle his own finances, let alone mother's. Years ago, he got himself into financial difficulty and filed Chapter 13 bankruptcy, then decided to file Chapter 7 so he could wipe the slate clean and buy new stuff on credit. He also ended up getting in trouble at work, for which they suspended him without pay for 6 months (he told the family he was "laid off" due to a lack of work - not the truth). He had to find two or three part time jobs just to make ends meet. Once he began working his regular job again, he bought a house. Things were fine until he bought a lot of mowing equipment to start his own business on the side. He then got himself into legal trouble (charged with Intimidation and Criminal Recklessness, Class C and Class D felonies). He finally entered into a plea agreement, changing the charge to Criminal Recklessness Class A Misdemeanor and one year of probation.

Of course, he was required to wear an ankle bracelet. When that was taken off, he went out to play pool with his fiance and the next day was tested for alcohol in his system (he wasn't supposed to drink any alcohol during his probationary period). He tested positive, and his excuse was that a doctor had prescribed cough syrup with alcohol in it. That proved to be a false statement - found out he'd been drinking beer when playing pool. So then they put him in a program where he had to stay in a half-way house for alcoholics and the only place he was allowd to go was to work. Somewhere in all this, his place of employment put him on days - so he lost his night bonus... and if memory serves me correctly, he also was not given any overtime. He was released from his probation just after January 1st this year.

Somewhere in all this mess, he has defaulted on loans. His house is currently in foreclosure proceedings.

And HE wants Power of Attorney.

I was at mom's house on June 26th, and we had been having a wonderful visit and reconciliation. I admitted that my pride tended to get in the way of my common sense, and I apologized to her. Pride is my worst sin, and the reason why I believe that I can only try to mitigate what level of hell I end up in, rather than ever being allowed into heaven.

What I had found out about Bill's stay with mother was, when he had been at mom's house after bringing her home, he had done some work for her. Mom offered to pay him, but instead he wanted one of the cans of silver coins that dad had collected when back in the early 70's he had speculated silver would increase in cost. (OK, dad was right, only he was 30+ years too early... so, not in time for dad to realize any potential profit.) Mom said Bill could take one can. While I was there on June 26, he called her and told her that the silver was worth a lot of money (no shit, Sherlock) and she should let him sell it for her so she could get some money out of it.


Now, my mother's best friend Phyllis was there when he called, as was I, and we both agreed that if mom let Bill have the silver, she wouldn't see very much of the proceeds from it, if any. Phyllis urged mom NOT to give it to Bill. I was in total agreement. I was aghast that my brother would be charging my mom to do things for her while she was still in a recovery stage from open heart surgery - or for any reason at all. She is his mother and deserved more respect than that.

She moved the money to a safe place. I'm not telling where, but it would be next to impossible to find it. She decided that she was not going to be taken advantage of any longer.

Later that evening, on the 26th, Bill called her to ask if she had made him Power of Attorney yet. She said no, she wasn't going to do it. He got extremely angry with her. And then he had the audacity to say that mom didn't pay his (now) wife enough to help her out with her medications.

Supposedly, Erika had come to her house to get her medications in order in her pill box. The truth is, I had already done that when mom had gone home temporarily on May 13. The meds were almost identical except for the coumadin she was taking. There was actually very little that Erika had to do. She did create a large poster board with her meds listed and the time to take them, but even that has changed since it was created - so it wasn't exactly a good solution to mom's problem. Mom had paid Erika $50 for doing this.

It is outrageous that mom was "charged" to do this. When I'd brought mom home on May 13, I bought her groceries, cooked her supper, washed her dishes, put some of her clothes away, took her trash around to the front for the garbage men the next day (and there was a LOT of stinky trash), and I fixed her pillboxes with her meds. I never asked for nor expected one cent for any of this. I did it because she was my mother and needed my help. I would do the same for my husband's mother, if needed. This, in my opinion, is the definition of what FAMILY does for one another in times of need.

Needless to say, Bill was upset and furious that mom wasn't going to capitulate to him.

Mom hung up from that conversation. Not too much longer after she'd hung up, she got a call from Richard, who began screaming that she was a whore, a slut, a bitch and she was called quite a few other names before she said she didn't have to listen to it and hung up on him. Richard, being ever the narcissist, tried to call back and mom just ended up hanging up on him again.

Here's something you should know about Richard. He told my mother's best friend that he was a millionaire. He bought a Mercedes and the money was just rolling in. He told my mother's neighbor that he was rich beyond his wildest dreams, a millionaire, and he was going to buy two mansions in Indianapolis - one for his doctor boyfriend (yes, Richard is gay) and one for him and mom to live in. The one he was buying for mom and him would have a swimming pool in the back and she could go swimming any time she liked. (Hair stands up on the back of my neck when I hear this - mom does not swim - can't even float, and doesn't want to learn at 72 years old.) Then he called one of our aunts and told her that he couldn't afford to come out and see mom because it was too expensive, he couldn't afford an airline ticket and gas cost too much. Then he called mom and said he couldn't come out to see her because I would make trouble for him. Which story does one believe? And if Richard is so rich, why doesn't HE bail Bill out of his troubles? Bill isn't smart enough to figure that one out for himself. Unless Richard is giving Bill the "I'm too poor" excuse.

I had earlier in the day told mom that, after hearing what her neighbor said about Richard telling her to "butt out" (in so many words), I believed Richard was behind Bill's lies and was manipulating Bill to get her to give him Power of Attorney. Bill is not smart enough to come up with this on his own. And Richard thinks he's smarter than all the rest of the world combined. Bill is easily led into believing or doing whatever others want him to believe or do when people around him play on his status as a victim. Tug that invisible ring through his nose and he just blindly follows along.

Mom called me that night to tell me about the phone calls from Bill and then Richard. All I could say was, the phone call from Richard just proved to me that he was behind it all and now he's mad that mom didn't go along with it. He obviously thinks she's either incredibly stupid or so out of it she doesn't know up from down. He is wrong.... very wrong.

The next evening, on the 27th, when I was sitting in the living room with my husband, I told him I fully expected that their next move would be to call Child Protective Services on us with some complaint, to which my husband replied, "Nooooo, they wouldn't go that far, would they?"

Ahem....

Kenzie and I spent July 1 through the 3rd with mom, helping take her to appointments she had and taking care of anything she needed done (like refilling prescriptions). Tuesday evening, I saw I had a voicemail on my cell phone, to which I called and heard Roy say he needed to talk with me. I called and he wanted to know when I was coming home. He needed to show me something, but didn't want to discuss it on the phone. Then I called him back and said I need to know what is going on. He told me that he had found a note on our door from a social worker and it said they needed to come talk with us about allegations made about us abusing and neglecting our daughter.

All I could say was, "What did I tell you last week? Didn't I say this would happen?"

I told mom about it... and Kenzie overheard. She began to cry and say she didn't want to be taken from me - heartbreaking tears and sobbing, clinging to my neck. I held her and told her that in NO WAY was anyone ever going to take her from us. We were her parents, and we were GOOD parents, and there was no reason for anyone to think we weren't. No one would ever take her from her family or home. Later, when driving home, she said, "Bill and Richard are mean men!"

I agree with her wholeheartedly.

My mother called her neighbor and told her what had happened. That's when her neighbor blurted out, " Oh my God, he did say he was going to do that. I just though he was mad and blowing off steam. I didn't pay it any attention." What Richard had said was that he was going to call child welfare on me because I deserved it and was mentally ill.

I dunno... for people who have read this blog, I don't think I rise to the level of mental illness. Certifiably crazy in love with our daughter - but not mentally ill.

Well, suffice it to say we saw the social worker on Friday, July 6. She came and told us of the allegations. Both allegations had a small kernel of truth to them, but each was shown to be unsubstantiated. For one of the allegations, we had previously had two social workers at our homes approving us for adoption, and we had fully disclosed to them an issue that was found to be okay by them... and now by the social worker from the Department of Child Services.

I don't understand how they thought this would help them. They just appear to be hateful, vengeful, and spiteful. When hate takes over your life, then there is no room for logic, reason or sense. And no compassion - they simply have a feeling of entitlement and rage.

I have a few opinions as to what comes next... I won't list them here, but I know this won't be the last of it.

Do I hear offers from Lifetime for the rights to a made for TV movie?

June 14, 2007 made 3 years as a family. (Kenzie was adopted on June 14, 2004.) I was up in the middle of the night for two nights in a row and had to get up extremely early this morning to finish this video. It has pictures in chronological order of month/year from when we adopted Kenzie in China to the present (actually the last picture was taken last Tuesday, the 12th!)

This brought me so much joy to make, remembering all the fun we had, and knowing that there will be more fun in the future for us.

My first video using my macbook...

For some ungodly reason, I have come to think that writing in my blog is harder than doing a video... which doesn't make sense to me, because it takes far longer to make the video, then download it, then edit it, then review and refine, then create the type of file I want it to be, and then to upload it to Youtube. It could take me probably 1/10th of the time to just write what I want to say, but NooOOOOoooo~ I'd rather do it on video. One of my few creative outlets these days.

Well, here's what I did at around 4 am in the morning (last week) playing around with my macbook. I am having the most wonderful time with this mac - and I love how it has worked so far. It has been a lot of fun. OH, and the cat is out of the bag... my husband now knows I have TWO laptops.. an HP and the Macbook. Oh, well... he was going to find out sooner or later... I guess for his sake, we can use the HP for him. But I want to keep the mac for me.

These were my ramblings at 4 am in the morning about China and the issues surrounding abandonment/IA/similarities and differences in our attitudes toward children. Not too coherant and could have fleshed it out a little, but I think people will get the drift of how I feel about things.