All kinds of hurt

Well, I have to have a root canal. I haven't been to a dentist for 11 or 12 years. I can just hear people out there telling me I'm nuts. But I rarely have any trouble, and when I do, it will always be big trouble. My husband goes to the dentist every 6 months like clockwork, and he had to have a root canal, too... so tell me it's only because I don't go to the dentist at all. I don't believe it.

Worse yet, they have me on Loritabs. I hate drugs of any sort, especially pain killers. So I have to take these (the pain is too much to just grin and bear it) and it seems that I am building up a resistance to them real fast. The pills' effects wear off about an hour and a half before I need to take the next pill. Agony.

And then, this dentist wants to charge me almost twice as much as what my husband was charged last year. Costs couldn't have gone up that much. Unless the difference is that they'll have to remove some bone to do the root canal, and are putting me out, and are giving me a porcelain crown and not a metal one. NOTE TO SELF: Call the dentist and have them give you a run down of the costs.

Then on top of this... we have been tracking a little girl on a blogger's site. She would be a special needs child, since she'd had heart surgery. We wanted to get her file, if possible... but I found out recently that two other people are trying to get her file as well. So, I think our chances of her file being sent to our agency has pretty much gone down the can. This kid captured my heart - but maybe that was so I would open it up to the possibility of special needs. Anyway, it is a bit disheartening.

I'm wondering what else is going to happen to make the month of June special. I don't think I want to find out.

I turn 50

I turned 50 years old yesterday. I don't feel old. Except when I try to get up from the floor after having sat down to play with my daughter. She jumps up in a nanosecond yelling, "C'mon mommy!" Mommy struggles.

OK, I'm no spring chicken. I'm also not willing to give up, though. I intend to fight old age (even though I know that's a losing battle). But I can brag that at 50, I don't have one white or grey hair on my head. It's all natural. Too bad the rest of me has gone into the crapper.

The next batch of waiting children came in on May 26 at our agency. It took them until this morning to post them. Most of the children are already promised. There is only one I would have wanted to adopt... and they are already working towards her adoption. There are days I wonder if we'll ever find our next daughter. Okay, enough feeling sorry for myself. However, the competition for waiting children is so tough right now. I don't think it had ever been that intense. I guess in one way, China's extension of the wait for a referral has helped more of their waiting children find their forever families. Good for the kids!!!!

Well, I have to say, for 50 years old, I'm actually pretty happy... I'll always take whatever age I am over the alternative.