Drumroll please.... Meet our new daughter!

I am so excited to announce that we are accepting our referral for our new daughter! I can hardly believe that this is happening - and our hearts are soaring! Now we have a million questions to ask our agency so we can get started planning our trip and what to bring and do.

I can hardly contain myself!!!!

Here are a couple of pics of her. She is beatiful, isn't she?





Her name is Qin Jia. She is at the Jiamusi CWI in Heilongjiang province. She was born Feb 28, 2004 - and she's a monkey just like me! I can't wait to travel to China and get her.

OH my gosh - it's really going to happen. We're going to be a family of four!!!!
GOD is GOOD!

What great support...

I have to say that I am blown away by the support everyone has shown us. Thank you!

We got her medicals today and have forwarded everything to the IA doc. Now it is just a waiting game. I am not crazy about waiting... but I've waited so long - a couple more days won't hurt.

I don't know why, but I'm a lot calmer this time around than the last time. And I am once again planning everything in my head as to what we will be bringing and how I can approach her and make her feel more comfortable... what do I need to know or what words will I need to be able to speak to her in her own language to comfort her and communicate a little bit... or at least to understand what she is saying.

I need to find a good book on adopting older children from China - or older international children in general. Or find someplace where I can get expert advice from BTDT parents who adopted 4-6 y/0 kids and can help with suggestions. I just want to get it right so I'm not pulling my hair out or making things worse by doing something that will hurt the relationship from the start.

Counting my chickens before they've hatched here, so to speak. But I can't help myself. I want to be the mother to another little girl. And Kenzie wants a sister. OH, Please God, let this all come together.

Met Kenzie's Kindergarten teacher and she is very nice. I think Kenzie will love her. I leave in 3 minutes to take her to her school so she can see where she's going to go and to meet her teacher.

Looking more like June for referrals

The latest from Rumor Queen is that the cutoff is probably the 12th of January 2006. For the uninitiated in the realm of international adoption, that means that the China Center of Adoption Affairs is currently matching referrals to people's dossiers logged in between Jan 10-12, 2006. Sooooo..... we are Jan 16, which means that we probably won't see a referral until June of this year... or worse, July. My blog is coming true. Did I jinx myself? (NOTE TO SELF: STOP MAKING PREDICTIONS THAT ARE NEGATIVE....)

According to our local allergists, the pollen count for trees and grass is HIGH. No shit! My sinuses and lungs are feeling it right now. I have to occaisionally go into an animal lab that houses rats and mice to do some work, and that usually sends me into a tailspin with my allergies. But when I walk in there and get relief from my allergies... you know the pollen is bad!

Mom is coming along with therapy for her shoulder. Her physical therapist is very satisfied with her ability to walk and get up/down stairs, so she's going to stop the physical therapy on Thursday. But she'll still need about 3-4 weeks of occupational therapy, so she can dress herself. I think someone told mom that she would be "out of here in no time." Can't do that with my mother. She thinks that means that she was going to be sent home last weekend... or this weekend... or in a couple of days... she starts putting dates in her head rather than milestones to reach. But at this point, she's still not very rational. Case in point... she called me last night to say that there was no heat in her room and she's never going to stay in a rehab place ever again. I told her she just needed to talk with the people at the nurse's station. Instead, she wanted me to do it, because she was cold and she wasn't paying for a cold room and she didn't want to stay there any more (same old song and dance with mom...)

So I called the nurse, and she said Mom's roommate just talked with her about the heat not working. (The lady must be 10 years older than mom, but she's got sense enough to go to the source to get help.) The nurse was just leaving to walk down to the room to see what was wrong. Turns out the heating unit was unplugged. Mom can't do anything logical for herself... no - she likes being a victim rather than taking charge of her situations. My brothers are the same way. Sorry to be kvetching this way, but I'm just so tired between the allergies and no sleep and running interference for mom and keeping track of all the appointments I have for her and Kenzie and myself...

I'm hoping spring gets this pollen crap out of the way - only once the tree and grass pollen settle down, it will be weeds. I'm not sure I'll ever beat all the problems I have with the allergies.

OK, kvetching over. Tonight Kenzie is going to have a full dress recital and there will be pictures taken of the girls in their costumes. I am definitely doing the makeup thing with Kenzie. It'll be a trial run for Friday night's rehearsal, and then Saturday night's recital. I'm so excited for her.

I just want to hide somewhere

I don't feel like posting much - but sure wish I could hide in a hole for awhile.

Mom's going back in for surgery soon for a total shoulder replacement, the last one and hopefully it will make her life better. I wish she had done this four years ago when she first started having problems with her shoulders... but she was acting more like a little kid than an adult at that time. After letting the problem worsen with time, she finally came to the conclusion (when the pain got so great that she was in tears on a daily basis) that she needed to have the surgery. After the first shoulder was done, and she saw what a difference it made in her level of pain and her ability to do certain tasks, she was ready to jump in and get the other one done right away.

My brother Richard is finally calling mom again (after not having called her since Christmas day of 2007). On Christmas day, all he could do is tell her that it made him mad that she always took my side and not his. Now, does that sound like a mature, 49 year old man? Ummmm...... Nope. More like a 8 year old child. It's not a matter of mom taking sides. It's a matter of him acting like a jerk and treating mom badly when things don't go his way. And she isn't going to put up with it.

Now he's calling mom and is asking a thousand questions about Kenzie. I have forbidden mom to talk about her any more with him. My instincts have been dead on with my brothers since all this trouble started - and I'm never wrong about what is going on. Richard is fishing for something to hang on me. He's trying once again to get me into some kind of trouble. What he doesn't realize is that both he and Bill are just widening the gap between her and them. Anything that would hurt me would hurt Kenzie, and that is the last straw. If it goes any further with any other unsubstantiated allegations to any authorities, I get a really good bastard lawyer with a tough law firm and file charges. Defamation, harrassment, slander - whatever I can put in the suit.

There wasn't any referral this month - OBVIOUSLY - or I would have screamed it from the mountain tops. So now I feel like crawling into a little hole and just hibernating until the next round of referrals come. However, I really don't expect it to be coming in May. More like June (what a great birthday gift for me).

And with my job going to hourly and no more time off, any time I take off to help mom is time I don't get paid. However, I am there to help mom... and that is what I have to do.

Here's to hoping that things will look up once mom has the operation and can get back home from rehab.

Will we get a referral?

The latest rumors coming from different sources is that March's referrals will have a Jan 04, 2006 LID cutoff. If that is true, then our referral can't be but maybe 2-3 months away. Our LID is Jan 16, 2006.

I have been thinking that, since China has changed its rules as of May of last year, and with our ages and the wait we have had (25 1/2 months and counting), that we will not be granted a referral. It is a nagging feeling I've had since last year in May, and it has been so deprressing at times... But of course, I thought there was a good chance that we wouldn't get a referral during our first wait to adopt... and look what happened. We were matched with a child who was so wonderful.

So, the waiting and not knowing is about to come to an end. At least, in a couple of months, it should be nice to finally KNOW one way or another. The funny thing is, it will have been four years since we adopted Kenzie. Almost four years to the date.

I know it's wishful thinking, but I wish we could get our referral in April. Just like we got Kenzie's.

C'mon CCAA! I am counting on you to make us a family of four. And to give Kenzie a sister... and another of your beautiful children a home and family.